Customer Service Blues

Most companies are proud to herald the brilliance of their shiny new equipment, the high tech gadgets which make them stand out among the crowd, the amount of money they’ve spent to achieve this and the huge network they manage to keep it all afloat.

They may even be very proud of boasting the number of well known brand names clients using their service and how many awards they have won in bringing these to the market.

But, does any of this matter if the customer service to back up these services is less than desirable? To the customer it matters not one iota. It’s like bragging about how big your tool/motor/boat is yet you don’t know how to use it/them properly.

I’ve noticed most progressive companies, mainly American actually, are really keen on pushing their service when you call for technical support. Something in the order of: you call because your server is down and they want to sell you a computer!

In one case I actually took exception to this because it felt like the company I was dealing with was not really interest in servicing its current obligations: just focussed on selling something new.

This to me is not good customer service. Good customer service is where the company places the customer at the forefront or heart of its operations and delivers its products and services around that customer.

When I find such a company I will let you know. If or if you know of one, let me know!

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Baby Its Ovr Btween Us

Breaking up is supposed to be hard to do, but young Australian couples have found an easy solution — send a text message and move on.

Research shows young romantics are increasingly using SMS text messages to manage, and even end their relationships.

Macquarie University researcher Natalie Robinson studied the texting habits of 100 young people aged 18-35 and found SMS messaging increased when relationships were beginning or going through a rocky period.

Robinson said couples, fearing rejection, wanted to avoid direct contact when their relationships were strained.

“People used text messages to show their negative feelings rather than talking face-to-face,” she said. “This might be because text messages were less confrontational and more distant.”

The clinical psychologist said she was surprised to find 15 percent of participants had dumped a partner via text messages.

Robinson said one of her friends had been ditched in a text message and found it an unpleasant experience.

“She was very angry because it was so impersonal and because they had been together for a couple of years,” she said.

Overall, women were more likely to send texts telling their partner how they were feeling, while men were more comfortable with practical texts such as “I’ll pick up dinner on the way home.”

Robinson said people often used texts to keep tabs on partners who were out socializing with friends, creating the potential for friction.

“The receiver of this message may interpret this in a number of ways, such as, ‘my partner cares about me and just wants to know what I am doing’ or alternatively, ‘my partner is suspicious and doesn’t trust me and wants to know what I am doing,’” she said.

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Houston, We Have Crashed Landed!

Just why do the space craft have to re enter the aptmospere so fast?

If you slowed a spacecraft down you could come into the atmosphere very safely and land. The problem is that to orbit the Earth you have to go so really fast. Why? Well, first you have to understand a bit about orbits…

Here’s a simple way to think of how something gets into orbit around the Earth. Imagine a ball on a table. Now you push the ball and it rolls off the edge of the table. It lands on the ground near the table. Now you put it back on the table and push it faster – it rolls off the edge of the table but lands farther away. Now, say you pushed it so fast it landed a mile away from the table.

Keep in mind that the Earth is round… and now you push the ball so hard that it travels 100 miles. As it’s traveling along, you would see it “disappear” over the horizon. This is because the earth is round – and even though the ball falls toward the ground, the ground curves down away from the ball.

Now you can imagine pushing it so fast that it landed half-way around the world. Finally, if you pushed it so fast that the the earth was curving away from the ball the same amount that ball was falling – it would never land! It would just keep going around and around the Earth – it would be in Orbit. That speed is called “orbital velocity” and orbital velocity for the Earth is about 17,000 miles per hour – which is almost 5 miles per second! Now that’s fast.

It takes a lot of energy to get something going that fast. When you see the Space Shuttle take off it has that big orange tank full of rocket fuel for its engines and two additional white rockets attached to the sides of the tank. It takes all of that to get the shuttle to 17,000 miles per hour. Plus, it has to get high enough to get out of the atmosphere so there’s no drag to slow it down. Then, once it’s going 17,000 miles per hour, it can shut off it’s engines and just keep going around and around.

Then to land, it has to get its speed from 17,000 miles per hour back to zero. If they tried to do that completely with rocket engines, it would take just as much fuel to slow it down as it did to get it going! To haul that much extra fuel would mean the rocket would be to heavy to lift off in the first place.

Instead what happens is the shuttle turns around backward and fires two small engines (you can see them on each side of the tail of the Space Shuttle). These engines slow them down just a very small amount. But it’s enough that they start to get closer and closer to the ground. As they get closer, they start to hit the atmosphere. The atmosphere rubbing against the shuttle causes drag (friction), which causes them to slow down even more. Eventually, they are slow enough to land – this whole process takes about an hour from the time they fire the small engines.

Incidentally, when they first hit the atmosphere, they are moving through the air so fast, that the air rubbing against the side of the Shuttle causes it to get really hot, and this is why they need all of the protective tiles. It was a hole in of one of these tiles that lead to the destruction of the Space Shuttle Columbia in February 2003.

I hope this helps you understand why they have to being going so fast when then come in.

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Play Some BlackMag Games

Nothing better than a little PC games fun to relax, chill and unwind sometime!

Action Games
Alien Invasion 2 Shoot those aliens
Bugz Eat the green stuff!
Shuriken Stop the Ninjas.

Board Games
Jamaican Dominoes Two flavours!

Casino Games
BlackJack Get to 21!

Classic Arcade Games
Asteroids Destroy ‘em!
PacMan Eat ‘em up!
Snake Gobble ‘em up!
Space Invaders Shoot ‘em up!

Classic Mind Games
TicTacToe 0s & Xs

Humour Activities
Dancing Blair See UK PM move!

Role Playing Games
DigiNinja Destroy enemy clanss

Sport Games
BaseBall Go for homerun!
BasketBall Shoot the hoops!
Super Hacky Sack Keep it up!
Table Tennis Smash it up!

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USA Black Comedians And Shows

Here is a list of Black comedians currently hot and making waves in a venue, TV screen, heart or mind near you…

USA BLACK COMEDIANS

Adelle Givens
A.J. Jamal
Arnez J
Bernie Mac
Berry Boyz, The
Bill Bellamy
Bill Cosby
Broderick Rice
Bruce Bruce
Carl Banks
Carl Strong
Cedric ‘The Entertainer’
Chris Rock
Chris Thomas
Chris Tucker
Chucky Jenkins
Darrell Joyce
Dave Chappelle
David Alan Grier
David Edwards
D.L. Hughley
Daman Wayans
Dana Point
Darren Carter
Debra Terry
Dolemite
Don “DC” Curry
Earthquake
Eddie Griffin
Eddie Murphy
Gary Owen
George Wallace
George Wilborn
Gil The Magnificent
Godfrey Danchimah
Guy Torry
Henry Coleman
Holly Robinson Peete
Ian Edwards
James Stephens III
Jamie Foxx
J. Anthony Brown
Joe Torry
John Henton
Just June
Kaynin Richardson
Keith Robinson
Lady Roz G
Larry D. Veal
Laura Hayes
Lawrence Crumpton
Macio
Malik Jubal
Mark Curry
Marlon Wayans
Martin Lawrence
Master Lee
Maverick
Meshelle Foreman
Michael Prince
Michael Winslow
Miss Clareese
Montanna Taylor
Myra J.
Nancy Cowart
Nipsey Russell
Patrice Oneal
Paul Mooney
Ralph Louis Harris
Reggie McFadden
Reginald D Hunter
Richard Pryor
Rickey Smiley
Robert Townsend
Rod Allison
Rod Man
Rodney Winfield
Rod of God Comedy
Rondell Sheridan
Royale Watkins
Rudy Ray Moore
Rudy Rush
Shang Forbes
Shawn Wayans
Sinbad
Sinck
Sister Quintella Caldwell
Sister Betty
Steve Harvey
Steve White
T.A. Burrows
Thea Vidale
Tommy Davidson
Tony Robinson
Tony Woods
T.P. Hearn
Tracy Morgan
Whoopi Goldberg
Wil
Wild Bill
Will Smith
Willie Tyler
Yvette Wilson

USA BLACK TV COMEDY

All My Children
Amos ‘N Andy
Benson
City of Angels
Cosbys, The
Def Comedy Jam
Diff’rent Strokes
Flip Wilson Show, The
For Your Love
Fresh Prince of Bel Air
Good Times
Hughleys, The
Jamie Foxx Show, The
Keenan & Kel
Jeffersons, The
Martin
Moesha
PJs, The
Sister Sister
Steve Harvey Show, The
Wayans Brothers, The

Click Here to tell us about a USA Black comedian or show we have missed.

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UK Black Comedians And Shows

Here is a list of Black comedians currently hot and making waves in a venue, TV screen, heart or mind near you…

UK BLACK COMEDIANS

Angie Le Mar
Aymer & Powell
Bibi Crew, The
Brian Bovell
Chris Tummings
Curtis Walker
Felicity Ethnic
Felix Dexter
Geoff Aymer
Geoff Shuman
Gina Yashere
Glazz Campbell
Helen da Silva
Ian Edwards
Ian Pryce
Jefferson & Whitfield
John Simmit (Mrs. Simmit’s son)
Judith Jacob
Junior Simpson
Kojo
Lenny Henry
Leo X Chester
Malcolm Fredericks
Marcus Powell
Maverick
Meera Syal
Miles Crawford
Paul Chowdhry
Ping Wing
Posse, The
Quincy
Reginald Hunter
Robbie Gee
Roger D
Roy Diamond
Rudy Lickwood
Sandra Bee
Shazia Mirza
Slim
Stephen K Amos
Stereo & Type
Suzette Llewellyn
Richard Blackwood
Rudy Lickwood
Vas Blackwood
Victor Romero
Wara
Wayne ‘Dibbi’ Rollins
Yvette Rochester-Duncan

UK BLACK TV COMEDY

Baby Father (more a drama than a comedy but we found it funny too!)
Club Class
Blouse & Skirt
Desmonds, The
Empire Road
Fosters, The
Get Up, Stand Up
Kumars at No. 42, The
Love Thy Neighbour
No Problems
Oliver At Large
Porkpie
Real McCoy, The

Click Here to tell us about a UK Black comedian or show we have missed.

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UK Black Comedy (Part 1)

The BBC started several including The Real McCoy, which has endured a couple of series. Generally, however, the BBC don’t sustain black comedies.

Then came Blouse & Skirt, which debuted in 1996, housed within the BBC’s Black Zone A Force slot. The A Force, as if you don’t know, was a four hour weekly programme into which separate comedy, game show, drama, discussion, arts and entertainment serials were thrown into the blender! Not that we were ungrateful or anything. Hell, no. We were grateful alright!

What most Black viewers didn’t check for though, was the sleight, perceived or otherwise, of having to watch a programme that was relegated to the late night/early morning graveyard shift. It went out Fridays at 11 p.m. and by the time 2 a.m. came around you felt pretty dead yourself! Is that why they called the Black Zone?

The only long term commitment the BBC, or any British TV company for that matter, has shown to black comedians manifest itself in The Lenny Henry Show. This has been going for several series now, but more later on Lenny, who is easily the most celebrated UK Black comedian in the mainstream.

Spot The Black

In the beginning trying to find a black comedian on mainstream British TV, or anywhere else for that matter, was a non-starter. They just didn’t exist, except as bit parts in other people’s programmes. The OPPs we’re talking about here were handled by white producers and directors who were more concerned with entertaining their peers than in balance representation of black people. Political Correctness was not invented then!

The net effect of this was that very often the material these comedians were given, or accepted, were very demeaning to themselves and blacks generally. But what the heck, it was a living! And if one joker turned it down on ethical or moral ground, another fool would jump in like a shot…

In the ’70s TV show The Comedians, you had mixed raced guys like Charlie Williams doing his “chalky” diatribe in a genuinely thick northern England accent. (Williams was fund of calling white people “chalky” , but it was done in a very non-offensive way. The term probably referred to the colour of blackboard chalk).

Despite what he really was, he came across as a ‘white black man’ and it made you cringe because out on the streets we were struggling to keep our black identity intact and he seemed to be messing it up big time!

Perhaps it was because seeing a black face on TV was so unusual that it seemed all our hopes and dreams rested on Williams’ shoulders; it was a career boost for him, while we were looking for positive representation. But that was the wrong programme. And Williams even had to share the studio floor with Bernard Manning, an out and out racist, masquerading as a comedian.

Love Thy Neighbour

In sitcoms you had Trinidadian actor Rudolph Walker battling with his white neighbour Jack Smethyrst in Love They Neighbour. They traded racial insults – Smethyrst’s “nig nog and sambo” against Walker’s “honky.”

It was all ‘good clean fun’, or at least that’s what we thought as youngsters. It was more the case that we watched because it was one of the very few things in the mainstream that had any black people in it. Apart from those in which blacks were paraded as criminals!

A more progressive campaign for the production of programmes with more black content were needed. The Fosters, Empire Road, No Problems and I’m sure there were others, rolled off the production line with varying degrees of success. None lasted, until Desmonds, starring Norman Beaton who died in 1995, came on the scene.

The Desmonds

The Desmonds became Channel Four’s most successful homegrown comedy series period, let alone one written, produced and directed by a black professional, in this case film maker Trix Worrell. When Beaton died in 1995, Desmonds did too and Porkpie, a spin off starring Ram John Holder, took its place with lesser success.

But why did it take so long for black comedians to get this far? It’s not as if the talent wasn’t there. It was more the case that UK black comics found so many obstacles that they chose to work in theatre or as stand up comedians instead. But in most other areas, namely social, political and economical, the pressure was also there.

New Cross Fire

On January 18, 1981 14 young people died in a fire which broke out at a house party in New Cross, south east London. There were great speculation that racists were responsible for the fire, as many of the victims were Black.

The police were very quick to dismiss the racist allegations and were accused of making insufficient effort to find the truth. This cause severe distrust of the police and the establishment particularly since not one word of sympathy was offered to the victims families, as is normally the case by the prime minister and authorities in other tragedies.

Tension was high. Two months later, an estimated 10,000 people, led by now TV presenter Darcus Howe, (then based in Brixton, south London) marched on Downing Street in protest at the perceived racist attack and the police inaction.

Brixton Riots, 1981

A month later the Brixton riots exploded and with it the entire racial landscape because finally Black rage made its mark on a Britain that largely ignored and criminlised it.

This led to a build up of urban disturbances involving a number of black in the early ’80s. Clearly there was a crucial need for black concerns to be taken seriously. They could no longer be ignored. ‘Riots’ in places like Brixton (London), Toxteth (Liverpool), Moss Side (Manchester), Chapel Town (Leeds) and St. Paul’s (Bristol), saw to that.

This focussed much atttention on the plight of Blacks in Britain. Consequently money was begrudginly poured into these volatile (but vibrant!) innercity areas to improve them.

Particularly money and grants were doled out to encourage ethnic diversity and a number of Black theatre companies sprang up. The Voice newspaper, Britain’s leading Black publication, was born out of this ashes. Suddenly, money was available to rebuild the demaged communities or at least to beautify areas of it. Out of this cultural space a large number of Black comedy groups and most importantly, Black Comedians, who had grown up behind Lenny Henry, the elder statesman of Black Britich Comedy (maybe that’s the real abbreviation for the BBC!)…

Lenny Henry

Meanwhile, Black comedians saw the success which Lenny Henry had enjoyed and were inspired.

The reality, however, was that when loveable Lenny started he was doing objectionable material too. Like appearing in The Black & White Minstrel Show, an Al Jolson type programme that basically took the piss out of Black people for the entertainment of white people.

Lenny slowly gain in status and appeared as co-presenter on programmes like OTT (Over The Top) and TISWAS (a Saturday morning children’s programme). At times you got the impression that he was an appendage. Somewhere along the line, however, he found and got the respect he deserved. He was and still remains a beacon for British Black comedy success.

Detractors will point to his marriage to white comedienne Dawn French, the other half of the French and (Jennifer) Saunders duo, as evidence of his selling out, but that is another story…

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